told you now.

because I love you so much,
I'm sorry if I didn't give the things that you want,
because I love you so much,
I'm sorry if I made you so confused
for what is so called a real happiness,
because I love you so much,
I'm unable to define a real dividing line,
antara bahagia dan sengsara,
because I love you so much,
everyday I try so hard to make you smile,
smile like everyone surrounding you,
to imagine to have what they have,
to feel like the way they feel,
to feel the secure atmosphere like they do,
to push away the bad side of our story,
to have the sense of care from others,
the family,
because I love you so much self,
I'm sorry if I failed to make you smile in the past days.
I'm sorry dear self.

I dont have the guts,
if I'm unable to defend you in the hereafter world,
the place where people will blame each other.
will you put the blame on me?

"Pada hari ini Kami tutup mulut mereka; tangan mereka akan berkata kepada Kami dan kaki mereka akan memberi kesaksian terhadap apa yang dahulu mereka kerjakan." (36:65)